If you could only live an unpredictable life filled with uncertainty how would you instinctively feel? Does it bring excitement and wonder? Do you think of the endless possibilities and opportunities there would be for creativity and learning? Or does it make you feel uncomfortable, or even conjures up automatic thoughts of fear and anxiety?

If you think the latter is more your current lean to thinking, then this article is a MUST READ for you. In it you will discover the advantages to living with the unknown, how to find peace with living in the present and why you need to let go of continually trying to control your future. 
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Most of us go to great efforts to bring control into our lives. We can’t bear the thought of living with unpredictable futures. We spend much of our time reliving past hurts and working out the possible outcomes of our future. We avoid even the thought of experiencing any possible pain, suffering or loss that uncertainty may bring. 

The disadvantages to living a life of control 
When we try to control every element of our lives, life becomes;
• Predictable
• Routine
• Unimaginative and uncreative
• Fear filled and cautionary
• Restrictive
• Exhausting
• Stressful and negative
• Ordinary and non-progressive

Here’s some examples of how we limit our lives because of fear of the unknown; 
Missing out on an amazing adventure holiday abroad for fear of contracting some disease, or being unfamiliar with the country and not being able to predict what may or may not happen there.

Staying in a job that you really can’t stand, because it pays well and if you can stay there long enough you should get a comfortable pension.

Putting off returning to study for fear of failure and wasting your time and money.

Why we feel the need for control and avoid the unknown
In order to let go of control we need to understand why we feel the need to control our lives. Largely this is born out of fear of change or loss. When change happens, feelings of vulnerability and uncertainty often follows. We then feel we are risking our security and comfort. Negative self-talk kicks in telling us we are likely to experience something that could cause us pain. So the question we should be asking ourselves here is, how do we get used to coping with change? How do we make change comfortable, and not painful to live with, so we no longer fear it, and learn to accept it?

Newsflash! Change is inevitable! When we live in our comfort zone, risk and pain is still a probability. The problem is that if we don’t learn to experience it and get comfortable with it, we are far less resilient to change when its forced upon us, which makes for a more painful transition back into our comfort zone.

Living with uncertainty
The best option we have to protect our self from pain is to learn to live with change and uncertainty. When we choose to live a little more with the unknown and stop trying to control every last little outcome, that’s when the pain and negativity dissolves and the magic happens! We allow ourselves to experience life in the present. We become more aware, creative and imaginative, more courageous, adventurous, alive and open to new experiences. We feel excitement and anticipation for the limitless possibilities and outcomes it may bring. We feel an excited anticipation for the future. Life becomes more fulfilling and rewarding. Old self-sabotaging habits diminish, and we replace them with new, more optimistic habits.

The advantages of living with the unknown
• Opportunities to learn
• Limitless possibilities
• Freedom 
• Adaptability
• Positivity 
• Challenge and achievement
• Creativity
• Wealth and reward

Start getting comfortable with change and uncertainty
I’ve put together some tips that you could try in order to bring a little change and uncertainty into your life, so that you can start to get comfortable with the unknown, and start living a more rewarding and extraordinary life.

Try something you’ve never done before – something small, that’s still safe to you, but at the same time brings you out of your comfort zone. Perhaps painting, deep sea fishing, having a conversation with someone you’ve never met before, write a blog,  present at a conference, or sign up for that course you’ve been promising to do for ages. Then repeat and repeat and repeat, until it becomes your new habit.

Focus on the positives – Choose to see how change has shifted your perspective. Examine what positive experience the change has brought to your life. Look at what you have learnt, how you can make even greater changes to make the experience even better. What positives have you learnt about yourself that you weren’t previously aware of?

Acknowledge gratitude – Even when things don’t turn out how you would have liked, don’t view it as a failure. Find gratitude in what you have gained from the experience and give thanks for experiencing that change. It could be the people you have met, the lessons you have learnt, the skills it has brought you, the opportunities it opened up for you, the new, more desirable life it has brought you.

Getting peaceful with the present – this may at first seem odd to read this. We do need to visit the past to some degree, to recall our treasured memories and accomplishments etc. It’s nice to visit the future to keep our eyes on our desired destination. Having said this, we shouldn’t get too hung up on our future destination for fear of losing site of the journey we are experiencing on the way to our destination. By getting peaceful with the present, you just might see a more agreeable, authentic destination than the one you may have already designed for yourself. 

Change your routine – routines can be great as they help to organise your day, especially when your life is extraordinarily busy. The problem with living a life filled with routine it can become soulless and predictable, devoid of opportunity to experience the new, the different and the joyful. So mix it up a bit, this encourages your brain to make new connections and form new habits, making you ultimately more adaptable and comfortable with change, uncertainty and the unknown.

Practice letting go – Let go of self-doubt, fear, and trying to predict the future and open your heart to the freedom of the unknown. If you find this difficult, ask yourself; how well have these first three masters served me in the past? Chances are they’ve controlled you, forced you into a corner of predictability, caused you stress and anxiety and created limitations. Remember fear and self-doubt are conscious choices you make. These choices are discouraging and limiting choices. Abraham Lincoln uttered these wise words “Let no feeling of discouragement prey upon you, and in the end you are sure to succeed”. 

If you choose to live peacefully with uncertainty and the unknown, I wish you well and all the freedoms that it has to offer. 

Call to action: I would love to hear your feedback on this blog post, or you may have experienced positivity in the face of uncertainty. Maybe you have tips or stories you’d like to share about how to live peacefully with the unknown. Please like and RT this article on Twitter @asteriaLifeC.

Keep the faith!
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Julia

Hands up all those that want to feel joy any minute of the day, whenever or wherever you choose?

In this blog I’ll explain a little about joy, what it feels like to experience pure joy, and how you can feel it every day of your life.

No this isn’t some crazy gimmick, or inducement to buy into the next feel good gadget that will cost you a week’s wages. The truth is, joy is yours for the taking and you can feel it every day, whenever or wherever you are. Imagine that. Joy on tap! Now that really would be something worth celebrating and something worth showing gratitude for, wouldn’t it?

​Joy often comes unexpectedly into our lives. It can also be recalled by choice, as it evokes such intense emotions within us that the memory can last a lifetime, creating long term benefits for your physiological health and mental well-being. 

Joy has no time constraints. Joy never really leaves you. It can sometimes lay dormant, for days, weeks, months, even years, but when you knock on its door, it’s always there, waiting, ready to welcome you back with open arms. It’s not anyone’s to give, nor can it be taken away from you. It’s your joy, your precious place, which costs you nothing, but remains priceless.

Joy can also be shared with others. Researchers at the Utrecht University in the Netherlands have discovered that you can actually smell joy and happiness. Their research has revealed that humans can pick up whether a person is feeling joyful through their smell. Apparently this is a phenomenon known as chemo signalling. They explain that Chemo signals act as a sort of channel through which people can become 'emotionally synchronised', outside of their conscious awareness. Which means that when you experience an emotion, you can project that emotion onto others, not only in how you act or sound, but by the scent you radiate. This suggests, feeling joyous isn’t just an enjoyable experience for you, but it also has the power to be infectious, through your hearing, sight and sense of smell. So if you want to experience joy more often in your life, it’s important to keep positive, joyous people around you. 

No one can really tell you what your joy is.  It’s subjective. It’s like a fingerprint, it’s completely unique to you. What might be your joy, may not be another person’s joy. The best way I can describe joy is by telling you how it makes you feel.

So what does joy feel like?
Joy comes from your heart, and circulates throughout your whole body, so it’s full to overflowing. It can consume you. It has the power to relax, sooth or re-energises you. Your spirits are lifted, you feel great about yourself, possibly even euphoric. Joy isn’t necessarily just one emotion.  It's more often a collection of emotions that happen simultaneously. To feel a joy, you'll be aware of powerful emotions. Here’s just some of my favourite emotions; Love, elation, happiness, comfort, relaxation, delight, gratitude, relief, inspiration, enthusiasm, optimism, freedom, hope, power, enlightenment, self-worth, excitement, courage, awe, tranquility, contentment, serenity and harmony. 

How to receive joy into your daily life
To experience joy everyday requires self-awareness, a presence of mind. Being actively positive, and consciously aware of your emotions, your environment, even the people around you. You'll need to be willing to receive gratitude into your life, no matter how great or small it is.  Joy requires an open heart to receive it. Then acknowledge it and just let it in. 

You’ll know when you’ve found joy, in maybe a sudden smile that appears on your face, your eyes brighten, your heart feels fuller, and there’s an overwhelming sense of positive abundance within your entire body. You can receive joy in many ways, and it’s very often the little things that bring the greatest sense of irresistible joy.

Unexpected joy – requires no effort on your part for it to appear. Suddenly hey presto there it is! Your only conscious effort is that joy is in your heart and joy is your present state of mind. This could come from a kind word that you didn’t expect, or relief, gratitude and surprise that a situation you thought would be fraught, actually ended up friendly, good-natured and enjoyable. Maybe you listened to a sweet birdsong on your way to work? Perhaps like me, you hear a song come on the radio that just takes you back to a special place. Or the exhilaration, amazement and power of a sudden lightning storm flashing across the night sky. 

Recalling your past joy – Try to think back to a time you felt an overwhelming, and intense sense of joy. It could be watching the early morning sun rise. Hearing your baby giggle with delight. Or was it seeing them walk to you for the first time, as you encourage them to come to you? Possibly you walked past a scent, which immediately transported you back to a time in your childhood. A place where you felt security, warmth, innocence and pleasure. How about that challenge or exams you smashed, and those feelings of success, euphoria and sheer exhilaration? 

These are just some examples of what triggers our feelings of joy. So hold on to them, value, cherish and record them, either in your heart or document in a journal, detailing as much of the memory as you can. Think about where you were, who you were with, what time of day it was. Was it cool or warm? What scents surrounded you? Which emotions did you experience? 

If you can do this, then joy will be yours for the taking, not just in the moment, but time and time again, whenever and wherever you choose.  

Thank you for taking the time to read this blog. I wish you joy wherever you are, whatever you’re doing.

Julia

If you want to discover your star potential and think I may be able to help you, then please call me 07752565740
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